I love and am in love

With my boys. The toddler is in his brand new jammies that actually make him look his age, for once. Tonight, they have frog faces all over them and actually have the little footies. Tomorrow will be teddy bear heads. His big boy clothes (all in 3T despite his barely being 2 and a 1/4) make him look like he'll be pledging a frat house by the end of the week. I love that look but at night, when he's clean and in his jammies and climbing all over me for hugs and snuggles, I just love it. And I love how the baby still scooches his little legs up underneath himself and his little diapered tooshie sticks out just asking to be rhythmically tapped as I rock him.
I am that mom who always creeps in to check on them one last time before I turn in for the night. It's been suggested to me by a couple of friends who have the video monitors that I should get one, especially since the baby is a rather light sleeper. But really, I go in not just to make sure that they're still breathing (that's the primary reason) but to sneak in one last touch and one last kiss. Oh and these days to move the baby tornado out from under the bumpers.
When the rocking chair was still in the toddler's room, I used to sneak in and pick him up out of bed (once he's out, he's DEAD to the world---as in the fire alarm went off in our old apartment and he slept through the whole debacle of ringing and leaving the building) and sit with him in the rocking chair. Just because he's so peaceful when sleeping. He just instinctively wraps his arms and legs around me and hugs me with no fussing or wriggling. After the whirlwind days of emotional roller coasters, it's just so calming. Even now, when I'm scooping him up off the floor to put him back into bed, I get that one last hug. We've even had a couple naps in the past week where I laid next to him on his bed until he fell asleep, just stroking him hair. Usually, he trashes around too much for this but of late he's been exceptionally cuddly and so he was game to just rest his head on my shoulder. It was tempting to just stay and nap with him.
I love it when the baby falls asleep in the Snugli. I can gently rest my cheek on his head and wrap my arms around him. It's as close to the feeling I had when I would rest my arms around my belly while pregnant as I can get.
Obviously, I love my boys because they're mine. I fed the little parasites and then hatched them so I have that bond. But I'm in love with them because I truly like them. They may leave me exhausted, frazzled, frantic, frustrated, exasperated, overwhelmed....but that's just a facet of their ages. I truly like their personalities and so I've fallen completely in love with them.
They say that the sense of being in love fades over time as the novelty of a relationship fades. I foresee myself singing a different tune when they hit middle school (ugh what a heinous age, really, to my friends who electively teach/taught that age, God bless!). I might not be so in love then. But till then, I love and am in love with my little muchachitos.